'White people be like my dog’s ex wife is coming over': 18 hilarious tweets about the storied lives of white people's dogs

Author image for Emmy Pratt
Emmy Pratt • Senior Editor
Feb 19, 2026 8:00 AM EST

These dogs have more interesting social lives than I do!

The "white people be like" joke format has been around the internet for years. It has not been as popular recently as it used to be, but the past week or so, it has come back in full force with the "White people be like my dog" tweets. It is a well-known stereotype that white people would do anything for their dogs, and that stereotype exists for a reason! There are entire industries devoted to pampering pets that certainly didn't exist 50 years ago. When I was 19, I worked at a dog bakery. I became an expert in frosting penmanship, writing a dog's name on bone-shaped cookies. I don't want to generalize, but let's say that we had a lot of white customers. 

There's nothing wrong with wanting to pamper your four-legged friends, but as a society, we should draw a line about how far is too far. I don't love the trend of people bringing their pets into grocery stores. Service dogs belong in all public spaces, but untrained German Shepherds do not. One time, I saw a woman bring her giant Great Dane into the Apple store, and all I could think was, "Why?" I'll tell you why…it's because she wanted attention. Five million people came up to her and asked her the same questions about her dog, and she became the belle of the ball. 

It's more interesting to think of the kinds of things people don't say/do with their dogs than the things that they do. Everyone knows some people have birthday parties for their dogs, but I don't think a single person on earth actually does Tarot Card readings for their dogs… unless they do and I'm missing out on some esoteric group of dog owners. If you are often miffed by the strange things that people spend on their pets, these hilarious tweets might be incredibly relatable. Either that, or they will make you laugh out loud.

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dogs lacrosse family guy viral memes funny tweets white people gluten free pet owners funny animals
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